If I
really mean what I say: “Jesus is the
most important truth in my life…”
Then a new car, new house, new dress, clean floor, …. these things won’t become the focus of my
life. But I am living in a tension
between living for Jesus and trying to
see/understand how that is lived out in this day, in this Monday, in this
season of uncertainty. I am longing to
be obedient, to be faithful, but there are so many paths before me – which one
do I take?? Which step do I take – in
which direction?? There are many paths that are calling for my attention and
some paths seem to be yelling louder than others.
As I ponder the uncertainty before me, I choose to remember
the practical ways I have discovered God’s direction in the past: habit, unexpected events, and then just
letting go.
Habit: During the years of Glen’s illness, I
was also in a season of tremendous uncertainty.
I routinely saw God provide for me in ways I couldn’t have imagined or
planned. Because my life was so
uncertain, I developed a habit, a routine of spending time with God daily – and
definitely moment by moment. One of my favorite ways to spend time with God now
is to take a short walk in the morning. As
I walk, I mediate on one or two scriptures and the mystery of God’s
creation. I have discovered the birds sing the loudest
in the morning. I think it is because
they are excited about the start of a NEW DAY.
For me, these morning walks have
become a way to sense God’s presence, His peace.
Unexpected: A
couple of weeks ago, I was driving to work and completely caught up mentally
with trying to solve at least one problem – to figure out what to do – which
step to take. A long time friend called me and left a message on my
phone: “I wanted to let you know I was
thinking about you today, I hope you have a good day.” This Christian friend
and I have a history together. She
walked with me during the season of Glen’s illness and death. She and I spent many hours praying in hospital
waiting rooms. I know that she is a
woman of faith, who also clings to Jesus for daily guidance, peace, and
provision. This unexpected message was a snap back to the reality of who I am in
Christ, a reminder that I have seen God provide in the past and I know He will continue
to provide in the present.
Letting go: At the
end of the day, when I have prayed, done my best at work, and just lived in the
reality of daily routine, the most important way for me to experience God’s
direction is to just LET IT GO. I am
very glad that I am not in charge of the universe; I don’t have to figure out
how to make a hummingbird, or a humpback whale.
God is in charge and He is still on the throne – even if I don’t understand. During the day, the most important step I can take
is toward Jesus. Some of my favorite
verses in the Bible are Habakkuk 3:17-19
“Though the fig tree does not blossom, and no fruit is on
its vines; though the produce of the olive fails and the fields yield no food;
though the flock is cut off from the fold and there is no herd in the stalls, (though
all of life’s problems haven’t been solved) Yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I
will exult in the God of my salvation.
God, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
and makes me tread upon the heights.”
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